Monthly Archives: March 2016

Trump, Cruz Participate In First-Ever Presidential “Yo Mama” Contest

 

For the first time in American presidential campaign history, Republican candidates Donald Trump and Ted Cruz  participated in a televised “Yo Mama” contest, which was broadcast live on CNN and Fox News Channel Saturday, March 26.

Tensions on the campaign trail have become intense between the two GOP front-runners in recent weeks, and the two have been engaged in a war of words on social media in recent days.  A SuperPAC supporting Cruz posted a nude picture of Trump’s wife, Melania Trump, earlier in the week, but Cruz denied any involvement.  Still, it drew the ire of Trump, who later Tweeted a picture disparaging Cruz’s wife Heidi’s looks.  On Friday, the National Enquirer ran a story accusing Cruz of numerous extramarital affairs, which Cruz has categorically denied and attributed as being generated by Trump’s campaign.

This set a heated tone for the evening’s contest, which began with a coin toss to determine which candidate would start the exchange.  While there were no moderators, Trump won the toss, and came out firing with an attack on Cruz’s mother’s eyes.

“Yo mama’s so cross-eyed, she thought her only child was a twin”

Trump’s words emitted “oohs” and laughter from the raucous crowd, which had enjoyed cocktails prior to the start of the contest.  Cruz came back firing with an observation about Trump’s mother’s posture.

“Yo mama’s so hunchbacked, she hits her head on speed bumps” said Cruz.

Trump looked unfazed by the remark, and the exchange continued to the delight of the audience.

After the contest concluded, most pundits expressed an opinion that Trump had come out on top.  This was highlighted by the final barb from Trump at the end of the nearly 30 minute exchange, which resulted in chants of “Trump!  Trump!  Trump!” from the crowd and a standing ovation, with several members of the audience performing hand gestures which had to be cut-away from during the live broadcast:

“Yo mama such a slut, that Foursquare has made her vagina a place to ‘check in'”

At the end of the debate, Trump and Cruz refused to shake hands, and Cruz appeared to utter expletives as he marched off stage.  A camera crew caught up with him minutes later, and asked him if he would entertain the idea of a pay-per-view penis-measurement competition.  While at first laughing it off, Cruz stated “well, our campaign managers have expressed an interest in a pissing contest, which I would prefer…But if that can’t happen, maybe we can talk.”

 

Donald Trump photo attribution:  By Michael Vadon [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Ted Cruz photo attribution:  Gage Skidmore [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons